machete mama

Observations after ten days in the jungle
¬ beautiful places appear even more magnificent at night
¬ even the most lax americans have a greater sense of punctuality than indigeous ecuadorians
¬ riding in the back of a cargo truck on a dirt road is an incredibly noisy and bone jarring affair to be avoided at all costs
¬ mosquito nets should be more widely used, as to increase the worldwide sense of sleeping within a chrysalis, with the result of more restful nights and vivid dreams
¬ ketchup is a positive addition to virtually any dish, and adds a welcome western edge to the monotony of dishes containing only root vegetables
¬ with great determination, one can pretend away the taste and observation of canned tuna in root-based entrees and overcome a lifelong nauseating aversion to said tuna
¬the proper treatment for a poisonous snakebite is as follows:
1. apply four tourniquets with great rapidity, begining closest to the area of the bite and ascending the affected limb until the flow of blood to the major artery closest the trunk of the body has been restricted.
2. with a sharp knife, make two incisions - one on each of the bite marks, so as to increase the expulsion of the venom tainted blood
3. inject .75mL of anti-venom serum in the affected area
4. inject an additional .75mL of anti-venom serum in the gluteus maximus
5. call an ambulance and get to a hospital as quickly as possible
- under no circumstances shall the victim run or get excited, as this increases the rate of blood circulation, quickening the transit of venom to the heart
- there are two kinds of snake venom: neuro-toxin and pulmonary-cardio-toxin, depending on the species of snake. some snakes have both - if you are bitten by this type of snake, you are most likely a goner.
¬the traditional american meal schedule has one meal too many
¬the jungle has remedies to many common ailments, including but not limited to sinusitis, headaches, and asthma
¬ an effective way to repel mosquitos is to poke a hole in a termite nest, collect some termtites on your hand, smash the termites up with both hands, and smear the resultant on exposed areas of the body.
¬rubber boots can be quite stylish
¬carrie h.´s unique laziness charateristics contribute to a very dirty lifestyle, in which she is loathe to do any hand laundering of clothing, which quickly leads to an umkept appearance and unpleasant odor.(note to keep this in mind when considering future long term expeditions in areas without running water)
¬insects do indeed rule the world